The Magic Bullet : Part 1 from Jim Vuocolo

Jim Vuocolo taught the first teleclass I ever took at Coach U, and has been an inspiration and source of wisdom in the 5 years since. Jim writes a newsletter, and his most recent writing really resonated with me. I share it with you, with his permission (sign up for yourself here.)

YOU ARE THE "MAGIC BULLET"
by Dr. James S. Vuocolo, Master Certified Coach

Over the past 25 years I have worked with literally thousands of people to further their professional and personal growth. Along the way, I've noticed that more than a few are on a quixotic quest for what I affectionately to as "the Magic Bullet". In other words, these people are searching for the ONE THING they currently lack that (they believe) will enable them to attain the results they desire in life or in business. I call this "the Magic Bullet Myth (MBM). Like most any myth, the MBM is mostly comprised of fluff that does not exist, and has only one part rooted in truth. The only portion of the MBM rooted in truth is that there IS only one thing that will produce the desired result - but it's never what these well-intentioned folks think it is. Consequently, like Don Quixote, they end up chasing after windmills, rather than attaining their desired ends. Here's how the MBM frequently plays out

Some years back, I was retained by a client I'll call Barney Evans. Barney is an Ivy League educated attorney who hired me to assist in taking his small legal practice to the next level of success which he defined as earning and keeping over one hundred thousand dollars per year. He admitted to having over thirty thousand dollars in credit card debt, and assured me he was working to pay this off. In fact, he was proud that he had paid down over ten thousand dollars of debt in the previous two years. He had a nagging feeling that something wasn't quite right. He saw many other graduates from his school getting ahead with far less intellectual capacity than he possessed, and he was frustrated and angry at his own lack of achievement while harboring resentment toward the success he perceived in others. Enter the Magic Bullet.

I show up one day for our third coaching session and Barney announces that he wants to attend a three day workshop that he believes will profoundly affect his life and business for the better. The event costs over three thousand dollars to attend, and he will need to spend much more for air travel, a rental car, and a hotel room at a Caribbean resort - but he's excited at the possibility. So excited, in fact, that he's willing to put the entire expense on a credit card, thus wiping out all of the progress he had made in reducing his debt over the previous two years. When asked for clarification regarding how this will assist his current efforts to attain his goals, Barney replies, "Well, I'm not sure - but I know that it will. These people are great, and I've been wanting to attend one of these for several years now. The next one is being held next month, and I'm going! They only hold these things two or three times a year, and I just can't wait any longer." We continue on from there, as follows:

Me: "You can't ... or won't?"

Barney: "Well, I suppose I could, but I want to do everything possible to further my business."

Me: "I understand and appreciate that. I'm just not certain how this event is going to do that, are you?"

Barney: "Well, not exactly. But I know two other attorneys who have attended these events in the past, and they both swear it was worth every penny."

Me: "Okay. So, speaking of pennies, why don't we devise a plan that will enable you to earn the money to be able to pay for this event the next time it's held in cash, rather than run up your credit card debt even further?"

Barney: "Because I don't want to wait. You have to understand that I'm fully capable of paying this off."

Me: "Well, it's your life and your call, of course. I'm simply looking out for the bottom line. Didn't you tell me last week that you feel the need to hire additional office help?"

Barney: "Yes. The secretary I have now is swamped with bookkeeping, and there are lots of other things I need to have done. I'll get to that when I return from this event."

Long story short, Barney and I agreed to part company at month's end. He felt as if I had no appreciation for his apparent genius, and was treating him like a child. If by this he meant I was not willing to endorse his desire for instant gratification in the form of purchasing an expensive new toy in the form of a workshop and related expenses via credit card to place himself further in debt, he was probably correct. He further justified his trip by redirecting the funds he undoubtedly believed he was saving on my fee that he could then apply toward attending this event.

The MBM is complete.

Margaret was a coaching colleague who hired me as a mentor to assist in building her coaching practice. She is a very talented woman who was transitioning from owning her own very successful environmental business. After twenty years, she had forgotten more about marketing and sales than most people learn. Yet after three months together, she says she wants to take a month off from our coaching in order to pay for a course that will assist her in marketing her practice. I sense the MBM is coming.

Margaret: "Well, they've just reduced the price of this course by 25%, so I'd like to take a month off from our coaching together in December to help me pay for this event, and then pick up with you after the new year."

Me: "Alright. And what's this course going to do for you?"

Margaret: "It's going to feature two coaches named (names withheld). Have you ever heard of either one?"

Me: "Yes, I know them both and have worked with them. Each is an excellent coach.. What will they be covering?"

Margaret: "Well, they're going to be focusing on how to market your coaching practice."

Me: "Aren't you already an expert in marketing?"

Margaret: "Well yes, I am - but not about coaching."

Me: "So what's different about marketing your coaching practice from the marketing of environmental services? Each is a service and form of consulting rather than a traditional product, yes?"

Margaret: "Yes. I suppose that's true. But each of the presenters have published works in this field."

Me: "Have you read their works?"

Margaret: "Yes, I have them both. I've read one and have not yet started the other."

Me: "Each of those works is excellent. I'm simply wondering what you expect to get from this course that you can't get from reading their works and applying to your own situation."

Margaret: "Well, if you were them wouldn't you want me to attend your course?"

Me: "Absolutely! I would want you to know that there's group dynamics in person that you can't get from reading a book or listening to me speak on a tape. But again, I go back to the point that, given your own expertise, you could probably be leading this course yourself, right?"

Margaret: "Well, I suppose so. And I know you could, too!"

Me: "And after taking this course, you'll still have to take the same steps to implement marketing techniques in your own practice as we've been dealing with in our coaching together, right?"

Margaret: "You mean in January?"

Me: "Right, or whenever you choose. So what have you actually gained and what have you actually lost from taking this course?"

Margaret: "Well, I would have gained the experience of having attended a course that I probably would have enjoyed but not learned much from, and I'd lose the money it cost plus a month of our work together."

Me: "Which is certainly your prerogative. But beyond simply our working together, I sense you may be losing something even more significant. Remember when we spoke about focusing you efforts and energy; and the fact that a desk lamp illumines a broad area of a desktop by diffusing the energy - while a laser beam using no more voltage than the desk lamp can concentrate a beam that bounces off a satellite in space and bounces back to earth again?"

Margaret: "So, you're saying I'm not focused if I take this course?"

Me: "Is that what you call 'being focused'?"

Margaret: "No, not really. I see what you mean. It's probably better for me to read the other coach's book in December while implementing my marketing by actually meeting with people, rather than diffusing my own energies by delaying the work I inevitably have to do in order to let others know about my practice."

Me: "Exactly the point."

Margaret: "Okay, I get it. Thanks! Let's go for the paying clients - I can take another marketing course any time!"

From these two coaching vignettes, you might be tempted to conclude that I'm against people engaging in continuing education events. This is not true for two simple reasons. First, because I, too, believe and participate in a certain amount of continuing education events each year and encourage my clients to do so when appropriate. And second, because it's not about any money being paid, or not paid, to me - it's about a loss of momentum and focus for each client!

I heard Barack Obama speak after the so- called "Super Tuesday" primary elections. Regardless of your own political affiliations and preferences, he said a few things that serve to dispel the Magic Bullet Myth, as follows

"Change will not come if we wait for some other person; or if we wait for some other time. We are the ones we've been waiting for. We are the change that we seek.... We are the hope of the future." - Barack Obama (Chicago 02/05/2008)

To her credit, Margaret got it, while Barney did not. When all is said and done, we are each our own Magic Bullet. Yet in order for that bullet to be aimed and fired, we need to get out of our own way. For some that may mean giving up some unattainable myth of perfection. For others, it means developing a deeper self confidence. For still others, it means putting and end to depriving the world of what you already know because of a misguided belief that you need to know more before acting. This can only be accomplished from within ourselves and not from any outside source. No workshop or seminar can impart it - and no one else can bestow it upon us. That's the real secret that serves to explain how it is that some of Barney's colleagues are getting further ahead with far less intellectual genius than he possesses. Quite simply, they are focused on creating and implementing their business and marketing plans, while he is increasing his debt in an effort to find the Magic Bullet that he hopes will enable him to succeed. While this may be an intellectually stimulating game, it will never produce the results he claims to desire. Focus and follow through is the only real Magic Bullet there is ... and it's found within each one of us.

Ready . Aim ... Go for it!

Dr. James S. Vuocolo, MCC
Master Certified, Mentor & Executive Coach
1227 Via Florence <> Redlands, CA 92374
(909) 794-2136
http://www.lifecoachconsulting.com