Make difficult meetings easier: offer a biscuit.

If you have a difficult meeting - arrange for biscuits.

A wise colleague back in my corporate lawyer days told me this, and he'd got it from an experienced barrister.

I've seen it work in surprising circumstances.  It's nothing earth-shattering, but when you have a difficult meeting, biscuits can make a difference.

Why does it work?

At the very least, having biscuits in a meeting can combat low blood sugar grumpiness. But more than that, the act of offering food draws on the ancient laws of hospitality, and reciprocity, which are ingrained in many cultures.

It's harder to be hostile to someone who has shown you hospitality (another way of looking at the saying "it's hard to bite the hand that feeds you").

Did you know the term "companion' derives from the Old French word compaignon literally ‘one who breaks bread with another,’ based on Latin com- ‘together with’ + panis ‘bread.’

My other theory is that one of the powerful underlying forces that can cause meetings to go off the rails is the feeling that one side doesn't like, or disrespects the other, or that there is an imbalance of power.

The small action of offering a biscuit, can provide a subtle psychological clue that the person offering likes or respects the other person.

Now, the hospitality doesn't have to be overgenerous - in fact that could backfire.

But I do suggest you make a point of offering a biscuit, or if you don't have that, a cup of tea and coffee.

Even if you say "can I get you a  glass of water?"  you  demonstrate your concern for the other party's wellbeing and thus put them at ease. (note: there is a difference between "can I get you a glass of water", and "there's water over there if you need it").

It's worked for me (memorably in a particularly tricky government inspection - where we went for more elaborate catering for the inspector, and got a glowing review.)

What's your experience?

Do you to want make a presentation at work, or speak to promote your business, but avoid it because you are afraid of public speaking?

Rachel can help you feel more confident, and do better at presentations.  E-mail, phone or text to arrange a no-obligation phonecall to find out about one to one coaching, small-group or speech planning sessions.

Email rachel@helpforspeakers.com, or ring or text 021 0275 9023 for more information.